5 Reasons Why Babies And Dogs Are Exactly The Same

I’ve recently been struck with the revelation that babies and dogs, particularly when they are puppies, are pretty much exactly the same. Yes, there are slight differences such as them being from a different species, but we’ll quickly gloss over technicalities such as that. The truth is that the closer you look, the more and more similarities start to appear.

I’m not saying that I know better than zoologists or that I’m planning on challenging Darwin’s Theory of Evolution, but spending the last 16 months of my life with a puppy, and then the last seven months of those 16 with a baby as well, does make me somewhat knowledgeable on this topic – although I’m sure the missus would probably disagree.

Since Dax joined our family in November 2013, a lot of my efforts have gone into training him. Not only so he does cool stuff like ring a bell to go outside and give us a high five, but to make sure he is obedient and well behaved, particularly as we knew a baby wouldn’t be too far away. This hard work at the start of his life has paid dividends as he *generally* does what we say (you can’t train the stubborn Dachshund out of a Dachshund), although it has been anything but easy.

I naively thought that I’d not have to go through the whole rigmarole of ‘training’ something else again – then Baby L arrived in August 2014 and it felt like the entire process started again. OK, so I know they have slightly different needs and you need to treat them differently – that night we left Baby L outside to fend for herself didn’t go down too well – but babies and dogs are remarkably similar.

Don’t believe me? Then have a read of five reasons (I could have written loads more but couldn’t be bothered) as to why babies and dogs are exactly the same:

  • Food is their main motivator: Everything that babies and dogs do is geared around food. For a baby, this starts off being milk before supplementing the white stuff with solids during weaning. For a dog, this also starts as milk (not human luckily) before becoming literally anything that they can find and eat before you’re quick enough to take it away from them. Show a baby a boob, and a dog a scrap of food, and they will react in the exact same way – wide-eyed, excited, drool and annoyed if they don’t get fed there and then. Their lives are based around food so much so that you can predict when they expect food and can start to identify the signs of hunger / expectancy. A baby will begin to stir, root and cry, whereas a dog will begin to follow you around, watch your every movement, and if you have a weird dog like us, start nudging you with his snout. Now Baby L is a bit older, we’ve also noticed that both baby and dog will, very rudely might I add, just stare at you when you have food. I’ve not quite worked out why yet, but I think it lies somewhere on the scale in between ‘guilt-trip’ and ‘intimidation’.
baby and dog stare

The simultaneous stare I get from baby and dog when I open a packet of crisps. Creepy!

 

  • There is no such thing as a lie in: Babies and dogs have this really annoying habit of waking early, which means you have to wake early too. It is very rare for either Hay or I to have not got out of bed before 7.30 am, either due to the baby or dog creating their own early morning alarm clock. The thing that pisses me off even more about this is that both critters then go back to sleep within a few hours. Babies will often have a nap around two hours after waking up for the day, whilst dogs pretty much spend their day laying on their bed unless attention, food or a walk is on offer. It wouldn’t take much for them to sleep a bit longer for the sake of my sanity, but being the annoying gits they are, I bet they get some kind of kick out of watching us get up early to be at their beck and call. So much for a lazy morning in bed.

 

  • Everything goes in their mouth: Unless it’s for drinking, eating or foreplay, adults rarely put things in their mouth. By contrast, babies and dogs will literally put anything and everything in their mouth. Nothing is off limits. Since Baby L has learnt to hold things in her tiny human hands, the first place they usually go is in her mouth. This has included toys, books, the TV control, mobile phones and, I hate to admit, a dirty nappy which I didn’t quite move out of her reach prior to a bath. Dax is similar, but arguably on a worse scale – whereas Baby L has use of her hands, Dax has to make do with stupidly little sausage dog legs which he’s unable to use for anything other than walking. This means that everything is done with his mouth, be it picking stuff up, playing with toys, fighting with my arm or ripping apart the used nappies we accidentally left on the floor when we went out.
baby munching and dirty nappies

Baby L chewing on a caterpillar tail (left) and the destruction caused by leaving dirty nappies near Dax (right).

 

  • They are entertained by the same things: It doesn’t take much to gain the attention of a dog or baby. A simple click or clap with your hands can have your sprog and dog looking attentively in your direction. Make any kind of verbal noise at the right pitch and both will be anticipating your next move. Jangling some keys will have your baby LOLing all over the shop and your dog springing like an Olympic show jumper. Basically, it doesn’t take much to entertain these simple minds. Something I have noticed though is that baby and dog toys are multi-purpose – a dog is more than happy with something designed for a baby, whilst a baby is more than happy to play with a dog toy. On numerous times, Baby L has flung around one of the dog’s chews, but more impressively, Dax has used his snout to press buttons on the sprog’s Vtech First Steps Baby Walker. With this in mind, I’m no longer going to buy stuff for them separately as it is just too expensive – instead, they can just learn to share and we’ll deal with rabies as and when it strikes.

 

  • They want stuff that isn’t theirs: As adults, we figure out that the grass isn’t always greener. However, babies and dogs are still to suss this out. Despite the abundance of stuff that they have, they will always want that one thing in your possession. Baby L is now at that age where she wants to grab everything. Any object within a metres proximity to her thieving hands will be subject to her attention. This means that you can’t do simple tasks anymore without an added complication – the laptop cursor will move randomly as she reaches for the mouse, the TV will turn over as she picks up the remote and you cannot eat without something grabbing at your wrists – even when she has exactly the same food! Dax is pretty much the same – he has plenty of toys and things to keep himself entertained, but anything that is Baby L’s is instantly more appealing to him. Her socks are his particular vice, potentially suggesting a growing foot fetish. The funniest thing he has done is claim the cushion we’ve put under the Jumperoo, which helps Baby L jump, as his new bed – even when she is having a bounce in it!
Baby dog steal

Both baby and dog like to steal stuff that doesn’t belong to them. Baby L steals the TV remotes (left) and Dax steals her Jumperoo cushion (right).

What do you think, do you believe me now? Have you noticed any similarities between your baby and dog, or baby and any other pets that you have? Let me know below 🙂

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  • Potty Mouthed Mum

    This has made me chuckle. I don’t have a dog, but I can see the similarities already ha ha

    • Thanks – get a dog, then the post will be even more relevant 🙂

  • I couldn’t agree more. We have a 6 year old collie and a 3 year old toddler and even now I see similarities though the toddler is so much more advanced but babies and puppies really are so alike.

    Very funny.

    • Thanks – yeah, I can imagine that when a baby becomes a toddler, they become less dog like – I wonder if they became more like any other animal – a baby monkey for instance?

  • Clemmie

    I could not agree more I have a 6 month old puppy and I am always saying its just like a human baby. My friends think I am mad but now you have confirmed all my points I shall share this and be smug 🙂

    • Haha pleased to have helped Clemmie and enjoy being smug with your friends 🙂

  • Talya Stone

    Absolutely! That’s why having a dog is such great preparation for a baby…although on the down side it’s why our dog got so peeved with our girl when she was a baby…it was like another dog coming into replace him!

    • Definitely – the 10 months we had with Dax prepared us really well for the arrival of a baby! Ah, we’ve not had that problem, but I can imagine a lot of dogs think they’ve been replaced 🙂

  • fashion-mommy

    So true! We were looking after a puppy during half term week and the little blighter got me up at 7.30 every morning, while my 6 year old had a lie in – I could’ve screamed!

    #BrilliantBlogposts

    • Haha I feel your pain. If it’s not the baby, it’s the dog in this house!

  • hahaha! It’s like you read my mind! So often lately I find myself saying (about my 5 month old), ‘she might as well be a puppy’. The way she plays with her toys, chews on everything…

    • Exactly! It is so obvious when you think about it, isn’t it. Cut from the same cloth!

  • Hehehe hilarious, and you are right, scarily similar… I love the picture of them both after your packet of crisps. Just you wait until they can team up… hehehe

    • Thanks – oh don’t say that, I can imagine they’ll be partners in crime together, focussed on making every day of mine as complicated as it can be!

  • So true, I’ve always said getting my kids to behave is like training a dog. I do count myself lucky that my dog and kids are all good sleepers and have to be forced out of bed each day.#thelist

    • Man, I’m well jealous – would love to have a dog and baby that wanted to lie in! 🙂

  • Life with Six Kids

    This made me smile. My mum (who is a dog trainer) says that how we teach toddlers and dogs are pretty much the same

    • I agree! Obviously don’t want to put a lead around the toddler, but I think some of the principles, e.g. consistency, are the same 🙂

  • hehehe! This made me laugh out loud…..I’ve never thought about it before but yes, they are basically the same!

    • Thanks – you’ll never look at a baby and dog in the same way again now 🙂

  • Rebecca Slinger

    I love this, it’s so true! Even the dog whines when she’s tired in this house, and she chewed everything when she was teething,

    Jack Russell and a 9 month old teething baby no wonder I am slightly bonkers.

    Mamamuse

    http://mummymuselovelyshoes.blogspot.co.uk

    • Haha, I feel your pain. Luckily the dog never chewed anything in our house. I have images of your baby and dog chewing on the same dog toy! 🙂

  • Jenny Eaves

    Ha ha, my mum is always comparing her dog to our kids! It annoys me a bit, but they definitely have similarities! 🙂

    • Haha – might be best to not show her this post then 🙂

  • martyn

    Haha absolutely brilliant!! And so true. Needed a great laugh so thank you! And thanks for linking up with us on the #bigfatlinky

  • You Baby Me Mummy

    Our dog used to sit under the jumperoo when Baby was in it too! Strange creatures! Babies and dogs. Thanks for linking up to #TheList x

    • Haha, really? Such a strange habit to have developed isn’t it.

  • Alana Perrin

    This is so true! I’ve found our dog and baby are both happier when they’re out of the house … it’s a shame the beagle finds it impossible to walk alongside the pram and gets run over by it every two minutes!
    Alana

    http://www.babyholiday.wordpress.com

    • Haha – yeah Dax is similar – he’s run over a few times every time we go out with the pram.

  • Love this post. Having grown up with dogs, but never having had one when we had one of our kids, I’d never really thought about their similarities. You are spot on with the big 5 in your list.

    I’ll have to remember these the next time I’m trying to get Hectic Grandson to do something…food is his motivator.

    • Thanks Jeff. They are pretty similar aren’t they 🙂 You could always try and get your grandson to do tricks for bits of food too 🙂

      • We did teach him to play fetch…but unlike a dog, at 1 year old he’s now throwing or kicking the ball for himself and then chasing it. Created a pretty neat little closed loop there LOL

  • crazymadmumof4

    This made me chuckle! We’ve been debating getting a dog when the babies get a bit bigger but I don’t think we’ll bother now! I’ve had 4 babies and a husband, I think the dog would push me over the edge! #SundayStars

    • Haha, sorry for putting you off! I don’t think I could handle getting a puppy after a baby, but it seems to have worked out having Dax 10 months before the little one.

  • Ha ha this is so true! I wish we coudl train babies to enjoy a lie in on the weekends!

    • Haha – I wish we could train babies to change their own nappies and get their own food too!

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  • haha this is so funny i haven’t had a dog for year but all the memories have come flooding back mine had a thing for slippers! thanks for linking up to #sundaystars

    • Thanks Amy – we don’t wear slippers in our house, but Dax loves my mum and dad’s slippers when we visit them. Strange creatures (the dogs, not my parents)

  • I love the picture of Dax under the jumperoo. I think my baby has a lot in common with a monkey. He particuarly likes throwing food at me. Thanks for linking up. #FridayFrolics

    • It’s so strange how he decided to live under there. The weird thing is that we went away for a week, then when we came back he has decided he wants to be back in his bed even though the cushion is still under the jumparoo! Haha, I expect to see a ‘why babies and monkeys are the same’ post from you soon.

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