Life Lessons For My Daughter From The Grave

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Do you ever wonder what life will be like for your kid(s) when you’ve kicked the bucket? Will they be happy? Will they do a job they enjoy? Will they have kids? Where will they live? What will their ambitions be? As a parent, the sad reality is that our kids will live a proportion of their life without us there – as such, all we can do is cherish the time we have and try to prepare them for the cruel world as best as we can.

I have no plans of leaving the Earth anytime soon, but as parents, we’re all just one kid-related injury away from visiting the morgue. Depressing, but true. So, on the assumption that some freak accident wipes me out in the near future, I’ve been thinking about what words of wisdom I’d want to pass onto Toddler L as part of the ‘Letters Of Life’ campaign with Compare The Market.

Along with author and presenter Giovanna Fletcher and my fellow DigiDads, we’ve all penned a letter with our life lessons and worldly advice – both profound and not so profound – to our kids. Below are some snippets from my letter to Toddler L. You can read the full thing – along with other open letters – on the Compare The Market site.


“Dear L,

If you are reading this, then it either means that (a) I am no longer of this world, or (b) you are on my laptop – in which case, please leave it alone, and whatever you do, don’t look in the Internet history…

…For an ‘advice letter’, my first point may be a little confusing. Take advice with a pinch of salt. Listen to what people have to say, process it, then make an informed decision yourself. People will always have an opinion – and will have no qualms in telling you what it is – but only you can decide what’s best for yourself and those around you…

…Surround yourself with people you can trust, who have your back and bring out the best in you. We’d all like to be the most popular person ever, but a few close friends who really ‘get you’ will be infinitely better than hundreds of acquaintances that don’t. Know though that not all friendships last. People change and situations change, so don’t be sad if your best friends forever are actually just best friends for a few years…

…I hope that society has changed for the better and you now live in a world free of discrimination, sexism, racism, homophobia and all that other crap. However, at the time of writing, society is horrendously unfair. Whatever anyone tells you, know that no-one – and I mean no-one – is better than you because of things like your gender, sexuality or ethnicity. Believe in yourself and be yourself…




Although a slightly morbid thing to think about, I actually enjoyed sitting down and contemplating what I wanted to pass on to Toddler L. Parenting can often feel like your just trying to get through each day, so having the chance to think and reflect on life lessons was a really worthwhile exercise.

As part of the campaign Compare The Market want you to get involved too and share your letters of life with your kids. So whether it’s a full letter like mine or a few snippets of advice, get sharing using #LettersOfLife on social media. Until then, I wish you a long and healthy life with your kids!

Disclosure: This is a commissioned post in collaboration with Compare The Market.